Jae! For you......

Oh, Jae *sigh*

My eyes are hazy, cloudy, and dark.

A storm came.

The tears they fall like rain.

Will my eyes ever be clear again?

Just once, I’d like to walk with you.

Until that day comes,

The sun will never be as bright.


Saranghae<3

To Park Jaebeom......

Let me start out by writing this. I'm a 38 year old woman. I'm married with 3 kids (2 boys, ages 14 and 12) and one little girl that will be 4. I've been married for 16 years. I've been around for a long time. Even though, I would be considered an "ahjumma" by some, this "ahjumma" has the heart and spirit of any 18-20 year old. Just call me "Noona" or "Unni," please.

In the past 6 months, I have come to love a boygroup called 2PM. I'll admit to thinking of myself as a member of HOTTEST (the fans of 2PM). Don't get me wrong, I still love my SuJu, too.

This past week has been a freakin' unrealistic nightmare for Jaebeom, leader of the boyband 2PM. As most of you know, Anti-netizens invaded Jae's personal life and found OLD responses to a friend's myspace account. I won't lie. The words were harsh, cruel, and maybe unjust. Koreans are "gay". Korea is "whack". And some other not-so-nice words, that at this moment, I can't remember because my mind is filled with sadness.

Last night, before going to bed, someone posted that Jae had quit the band. In the back of my mind, I wondered, but just let it go thinking it was just a joke. To my surprise, this morning, I find that that post was indeed true. And to my amazement, tears rolled down my face, my chest got tight, and the next thing I knew I was sobbing. And right now, the tears are still etching lines down my face........

I haven't felt this pain since the day, when I was a teenager, I found out that Duran Duran was splitting up. That was more than 20 years ago.

So how do I go about my day? I'm afraid to listen to my iPod and having to hear Jaebeom's voice rapping to Again & Again or 10 out of 10. I can't watch the videos. I'm sick. My heart is broken to pieces.

Now, here are my personal views on the situation.............

This has been said time and time and time again. He was a teenager when he expressed his views at that time. He was alone (no family, no friends, no culture, no language). He was training hours upon hours each day, exhausted day by day. To be placed in a foreign country, with no understanding, and hormones that were raging, what did anyone expect to come out of a frustrated kid's mouth?

So, there are these Anti-netizens who are fully against 2PM, find these hateful words and spread the "gospel" of hatred and bigotry throughout Korea, Asia, and everywhere anyone has a computer can read them. The "gospel" then comes around to the Korean media and a backlash of the greatest kind comes around and whips Jaebeom and 2PM in the butt. Jae apologizes to the fullest extent. And I truly believe he was sorry to the infinity power. You can see through old show and the most recent ones how his personality had changed over the years. Even the members of the group mentioned how Jae was very closed off at the beginning but as time went, he became more open and outgoing. You know the saying..."Time heals all wounds". I really believe that happened to Jae. But now, why won't the Anti-netizens let up, and let "time heal their wounds?"

Jae quit, in MY opinion, not for the sake of the Antis, but the sake of the members of 2PM. I truly think he believes that cutting himself off will heal the groups troubles. But instead, I think this is worse. Instead of cutting out the disease, find a cure first. If all else fails, then decide to have "surgery" to remove yourself.

These Antis have truly, wholeheartedly made every word that Jae said over 4 years ago....TRUE. The worst part out of the whole scenario....to make a petition to have him commit suicide. That is absurd. Making themselves into a god, and forcing Jae to decide his fate.

I truly hope that since Jae is coming HOME, that he can rest, cry, hold his family....and revive himself and that one day he will come back to 2PM. That once this whole fiasco is done and buried, he can regain what he once lost.

To Jae,

As a mom, a fan, and an "ahjumma", please have hope and live. You are surrounded by fans who love and support you.

As a mother of 2 boys, I feel strongly to just give you a great big hug. I can understand the worries your family, and especially your mom, are feeling right now.

I just hope that this is a mini-vacation for you. Rest, yes rest and ease you heart and mind. Pray to our God to ease your heavy burden. Right now, I'm sure his "phone" lines are being slammed by HOTTESTS around the world over.

I truly like you as a person. You stood up well. You admitted your faults and apologized. To me, that makes you a worthy man. You are truly honorable so please stand proud and hold your head up high. There is no shame for being human.

To the members of 2PM,

You all are bunch of wonderful guys, loved the world over. Don't lose hope. We stand behind you.